Experience shows me that gardening requires planning, tools and equipment, seeds, plants, good soil, fertilizer, weeding, digging, diligently watching for pests and disease, and expert advice from others. As we continue to use the metaphor of comparing our mind as a “garden” I wanted to “dig deeper” scientifically into the health benefits of the thoughts we think.
Occasionally I am asked to speak for women’s groups on a variety of subjects. During one particular Fall season, I was asked to speak on thanksgiving and gratitude. I started my research by first getting a definition of the two words. (As I research experts in the field, they too started with a definition).
Webster’s dictionary: thankful ~ “feeling or expressing gratitude; appreciative.”
gratitude: ~ “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.”
Thankfulness and gratitude are linked to overall happiness and are cultivated in our minds. We as humans have the capacity and ability to choose to be thankful and grateful in spite of our circumstances and surroundings. Just like being intentional in planting, weeding, and fertilizing an outside garden, the garden of our minds requires the same kind of diligence and intentionality.
Why This Is Important
The incredible amount of research being dedicated to the health benefits of thankfulness and gratitude is astounding. You can search for yourself by looking up “The Science of Gratitude” or “The Science of Happiness”. Again, I am not a doctor, but this research is very extensive and convicting. Benefits include:
Stronger immune systems and lower blood pressure;
Higher levels of positive emotions;
More joy, optimism, and happiness;
Acting with more generosity and compassion;
Feeling less lonely and isolated.
Resources:
Take your gratitude quiz from Berkeley University here
Dr. Robert Emmons, is one of the foremost authorities on the topic in America… gratitude power
Dr. P. Murali Doraiswamy, head of the division of biologic psychology at Duke University Medical Center:
“If [thankfulness] were a drug, it would be the world’s best-selling product with a health maintenance indication for every major organ system,”
“While the act of being thankful is not a substitute for a proper medical diagnosis and treatment, it’s certainly a strategy that can be used to enhance wellness.”
“Studies have shown measurable effects on multiple body and brain systems. Those include mood neurotransmitters (serotonin, norepinephrine), reproductive hormones (testosterone), social bonding hormones (oxytocin), cognitive and pleasure related neurotransmitters (dopamine), inflammatory and immune systems (cytokines), stress hormones (cortisol), cardiac and EEG rhythms, blood pressure, and blood sugar.”
Renee Jain, certified coach of positive psychology “When my coaching clients ask me why gratitude exercises work, I let them know that humans have something called a negativity bias where ‘bad stuff’ in our life outweighs the good by a measure of about 3:1,”
There’s no wrong way to keep a gratitude journal, but here are some general instructions as you get started.
15 minutes per day, at least once per week for at least two weeks. (Studies suggest three times per week might actually have a greater impact on our happiness than journaling every day.)
Write down up to five things for which you feel grateful. The physical record is important—don’t just do this exercise in your head. The things you list can be relatively small in importance (“The tasty sandwich I had for lunch today.”) or relatively large (“My sister gave birth to a healthy baby boy.”). The goal of the exercise is to remember a good event, experience, person, or thing in your life—then enjoy the good emotions that come with it.
As you write, here are nine important tips:
Be as specific as possible—specificity is key to fostering gratitude. “I’m grateful that my co-workers brought me soup when I was sick on Tuesday” will be more effective than “I’m grateful for my co-workers.”
Go for depth over breadth. Elaborating in detail about a particular person or thing for which you’re grateful carries more benefits than a superficial list of many things.
Get personal. Focusing on people to whom you are grateful has more of an impact than focusing on things for which you are grateful.
Try subtraction, not just addition. Consider what your life would be like without certain people or things, rather than just tallying up all the good stuff. Be grateful for the negative outcomes you avoided, escaped, prevented, or turned into something positive—try not to take that good fortune for granted.
See good things as “gifts.” Thinking of the good things in your life as gifts guards against taking them for granted. Try to relish and savor the gifts you’ve received.
Savor surprises. Try to record events that were unexpected or surprising, as these tend to elicit stronger levels of gratitude.
Revise if you repeat. Writing about some of the same people and things is OK, but zero in on a different aspect in detail.
Write regularly. Whether you write every other day or once a week, commit to a regular time to journal, then honor that commitment. But…
Don’t overdo it. Evidence suggests writing occasionally (1-3 times per week) is more beneficial than daily journaling. That might be because we adapt to positive events and can soon become numb to them—that’s why it helps to savor surprises.
It is in your best interest for overall health to focus on The Garden of Your Mind with much care and focus. Scripture fully supports what scientific research is saying. One of my favorite verses is 1 Thessalonians 4:16-18 “Be joyful always, pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
– this statement is printed on my cardboard box of Jiffy peat pots I had shipped to start my garden seeds in. I am literally sitting here at my kitchen table and I looked out the door with the words on this box in front of me. I can’t think of a better saying to build a post around dealing with relationships. This month we have focused on a garden theme and how these themes impact our health.
We started with “New Life in the Spring” and concrete ways to grow your own produce. I then touched on “The Garden of our Gut”, and the importance of growing a healthy gut biome. Our third post dealt with “The Garden of our Mind” and the impact our thoughts can have on our physical health and wellness.
The Longest Relationship Research Study Ever Done
This post targets the deeper meaning of planting and harvesting healthy relationships and the role they play in our health over a lifetime.
My husband really enjoys “TED Talks”, and my friend sent me this video to watch. This video is a little over twelve minutes, but the impact of this very real research is astounding. The title is “What Makes a Good Life?” and his opening question is “What makes us healthy and happy as we go through life?” Please watch, as I cannot explain this research with the ease and expertise of Robert Waldinger.
What If ?
I love watching the real stories of this research, but what about your story? I began thinking through my life and the relationships I have. I have had ups and downs; good and not so good – but overall, I have been completely blessed. My mind quickly went to people I have had contact with or have read about who have not had a life of great relationships. What if there are horrific circumstances of children sold into sex trafficking, or a lifetime of any variety of neglect or abuse? What if people are isolated or lonely (even in a room full of people)? What if depression or any number of blocks prevent relationship? What answer for health and happiness can we look for here?
The Answer
In my own mind and heart, I can only find one answer. During this incredible Easter season, it is the answer I have always clung to – the answer of Jesus Christ. His story is the ultimate relationship that can always be there in any place, at all times, all over the world. This relationship is full of love and hope and breaks through pain and loneliness. This relationship is always with us because we carry it inside us and it goes with us into eternity, forever. This relationship heals all wounds through forgiveness, mercy and grace. When this relationship is right, then all other relationships are just “gravy” or “icing on the cake”. God is relational and He built us to be relational. Our spiritual health does impact our physical health. I encourage you to focus on this relationship with Jesus this Easter. The story of Jesus is all about sowing and reaping; planting and harvesting – and bearing fruit in our relationships. Grow this garden well. Be blessed and have a very Happy Easter!
Recently I made a visit to the Chiropractor due to some pain in my shoulder and elbow. I had been working in the yard for a couple of days as well as increasing my exercise routine. I saw a new doctor in the office I went to. This doctor noticed that one side of my collarbone was bulging significantly higher than the other. I had never really noticed it, so the doctor had me go look in the mirror to see for myself. I then asked the doctor if it could be fixed. The answer came back to me very gently, but expressively, “No, it can’t”.
Several weeks later, I drove further to see a different Chiropractor we also use. I explained the collarbone issue that had been brought to my attention. This doctor confirmed the problem. When I asked “Can you fix it?”, the answer came back a very gentle and confident “Yes, I can fix it.”
Looking back on my life and even current circumstances have caused me to wrestle with tuff issues when I am forced to cry out “I can’t fix this!” This past week I was unable to sleep, fighting my anxious thoughts, dealing with areas of very real concern. These are the times in the middle of the night when things are quiet enough to hear a wonderful still small voice. I was able to reflect back on my life, to many times when I personally was such a mess that others looking at me would agree “I can’t fix this”. And then I remembered the two stories of my collarbone. I could hear in my mind the precious gentle words “Yes, I can fix this” coming from the One who fixed me. Jesus fixed me. That’s why He came. He already fixed the unfixable. He took it all on Himself.
I was filled with a sense of calm and encouragement. I felt a real sense of victory already won. I was also totally overwhelmed by the Grace that covered all about me what could not be fixed any other way – Grace that took my place and washed me white as snow.
Two beautiful songs about this wonderful Grace flooded my mind. Yes, He can fix “it” (whatever your “it” is). Here are the links to the songs and the lyrics that so comfort me. I pray they can be a comfort to you as well.
There are over 300 verses in the Bible dealing with fear; “Fear not”; “Do not be afraid”… A few examples include Joshua 1:9, Psalm 56:3-4, Psalm 91:4-8, Isaiah 44:8, Matthew 10:31, Luke 12:32, 2 Timothy 1:7, and Revelation 1:17.
As I was reading Psalm 18:4-6 it struck me how David often feared for his life, especially from Saul, who was his own king. This was David – who courageously killed Goliath as a young boy; who fought bravely in battle after battle and was victorious. Not only did he experience fear from Saul, but David pretended to be insane to save his life from Abimelech (Psalm 34). He was threatened by his own son Absalom and was forced to flee (Psalm 3). This mighty man of God – a brave warrior – had seasons of great fear.
I started thinking through other biblical heroes who also experienced seasons of fear. I started with Abraham in Genesis 12:10-13 and again in Genesis 20:2 when he was afraid of being killed so he claimed Sarah was his sister. Moses in Exodus 17:4 states “What am I to do with these people? They are almost ready to stone me.” Ester 4:16 “…And if I perish I perish.” Elijah in 1 Kings 19:3 “Elijah was afraid and ran for his life.” Peter in Matthew 14:30 “But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord save me!’” All four gospels record Peter’s denial of Jesus due to fear (Matt. 26: 69-74, Mark 14:66-72, Luke 22:55-62 and John 18:15-18, 25-27. Moments of fear seemed to affect them all. Fear can sometimes to overtake us as well.
I love going through the Psalms and listing the character attributes of God. All of Psalm 18, written by David, is a beautiful reminder of the strength and power of God in the midst of fearful circumstances. David lists God as his: strength, rock, fortress, deliverer, refuge, shield, salvation, stronghold, help, support, Savoir, avenger and rescuer.
As we go through our own seasons of fear, in whatever circumstances we find ourselves in, I find great comfort in the history of the heroes of scripture and the reminder of the might and power of God whom we can trust in the midst of the storms of life.
